Monday, April 27, 2020

You can never go home again

When people ask about my life

I find ways to explain the weather, my classwork, and

the meaning of the cloud at that angle

The variety of books I read when I feel tired on Monday

My favorite kinds of tea and biscuits

How much progress I’ve fallen behind in my classes

The number of fountain pens and inks I’ve collected over a decade

Anything, anything about the shades of blue in the sky

That I haven’t spoken to my brother for several months

That it’s been over a decade since I’ve spoken to a real-life friend

That I’ve been missing calls from my mother for the last few weeks

That I don’t remember my childhood apart from a few moments where I’m not even sure if was a dream or not

That when I visited my childhood home, I felt the uncertain feeling that I will never be able to return

How the process of becoming an adult is often the same process of losing myself

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